AM Coffee Talk #34 - Learning to be Flexible as a Military Spouse

The federal holiday on Monday threw a wrench in my week. I’m trying not to complain to much seeing as how I got an extra day to spend with my husband and all but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t throw off the rest of my week. If there is anything I’ve learned quickly as a military significant other and now a military spouse, it’s that you have to be flexible. Earlier this week I talked about my weekly routine and how I built it to be flexible because you truly never know what’s going to happen in life and boy, has it been put to the test this week. Throw in a hurricane that no one knew about and you’ve got the perfect recipe for disaster.

I’ve truly felt off all week, like I can’t get into a rhythm and I know that happens. Heck, it won’t be the last time it happens in our lives as a military family. I planned for Justin to be in the field all week, including only buying enough groceries for one person. That left us scurrying to the gas station to get a few more snacks before the hurricane hit us. Luckily it didn’t end up being too bad but a late start to Thursday morning and few other mishaps left me feeling unproductive and just knocked off track.

If there’s one piece of advice all new military spouses, girlfriends, and families should hear it’s that you have to learn to be flexible. Learning to be flexible as a military spouse is way easier said then done, especially if you’re a creature of habit like I am. Being thrown off of any sort of normal routine for me results in a long battle with triggered anxiety. But the need to be flexible is one that I’ve learned to anticipate as a military spouse. You truly never know when things are going to change. Even dates and locations are subject to change at a moments notice.

It can be hard to prepare to be flexible. Even if you know that something isn’t “set in stone” as they say, telling yourself that is a completely different story. But your happiness as a military spouse can literally hinge on your ability to be flexible. I don’t think it’s something that anyone ever becomes a pro at, but it’s something we all learn to take in stride.

Takeaways + Advice

Key takeaways:

  • Anything can and will happen

  • Being flexible as a military spouse can be your best weapon

  • Change is inevitable

I’ll be honest, the advice portion of this AM Coffee Talk is hard to write because flexibility is truly different for everyone. So I’ve chosen to share the reminders that work for me. If you have advice on learning to be flexible as a military spouse, please leave it in the comments below!

  • Remember: What the Army throws at you is most likely not personal

  • Remember: Someone has gone through the same or similar situation before

  • Remember: It’s okay to ask for help

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